Lessons I'm Learning

Well, today I weighed in for the first time in 5 weeks. Being a lifetime member, I just have to weigh in once every calendar month. Unfortunately, that ended up being a bad thing for me this last month - I gained 2 pounds and ended up being over 2 pounds over my goal weight, and so I had to pay $16.90 because of it. Boo. I have many feelings and much venting that I want to do as a result, but I don't have a lot of time and so I'll just say that I learned that
a) I'm too new at this "maintenance" thing to not be weighing in weekly - if I'd have weighed in sooner, I would have seen that I was gaining sooner, and hopefully put a stop to it sooner
b) I cannot let up at Weight Watchers at all - not even a little bit - or I gain. I have been doing Weight Watchers this month - just with a more relaxed attitude, and I still gained 2 pounds. You might say "oh, its only 2 pounds" but if a person did that every month, you'd gain 25 pounds in one year, 50 pounds after 2 years, and 100 pounds in just 4 years. Yeah. So, that's not okay.
c) Its going to seriously be a lifelong journey of learning how to do this right. Its been over 3 years since I first started weight watchers, and I have gotten better at it in many ways - more knowledgeable at least - but it still doesn't come easy. When you go to meetings and see the thin people weighing in there - don't make assumptions about them. They might be struggling with their eating just as much as you are - they're just at a different stage in their journey. I'm such a food addict and it sucks and I hate having to live with it, but I have to live with it and so I will continue on this journey and try to improve myself slowly over time.

So, I editted my little goal ticker thing over on the right to say that my goal is now to reach the 50 pound loss mark. I was only 0.8 away at one point, but now am 4.2 pounds away. So, instead of trying to get to the 60 pound loss next, I'm gonna break that down to a smaller goal of just 50. I'm going to start this week by ACTUALLY writing down EVERYTHING I eat for the whole week and my goal is to stay within my points. I haven't properly done that for a week since July, so that is my first goal. I'm tired of spinning my wheels (or driving backwards) and so I'm hoping to get a new start this week - even if it is the week Leanne is moving away, and my cat is sick and peeing all over and we have to go to Saskatoon to say good-bye to the house that Trevor's parents have lived in since he was born (cuz his parents are moving to Alberta in September) (and we are happy for them, but its still sad to say good-bye to our saskatoon home too!). Anyway, eating is what comforts me emotionally and I've got a lot of reason to need it this week - but if I do eat for comfort, I'll just keep gaining and that is NOT. OKAY. AT. ALL.

Okay, I'm done venting for now - off to bed with me. Good night Friends. <3

Wedding Weekend Away

This past weekend, Trevor and I went up to Saskatoon to a friend's wedding. It was really nice because we left the kids here with Leanne and got to have the drive alone and kind of a little getaway (even though we stayed at his parents' place!) :o) We had a lot of fun at the wedding (well, more so at the reception/dance!) and were really glad we could make it. I was looking through my pictures today and realized that I look thin - well specifically from behind!! I never see myself from the back, and so the pictures really surprised me! It was a nice reminder that I need to keep at this, even though its been tough lately. It was also fun to see some friends that we hadn't seen for a very long time and have them tell me I looked good and say things like "theres 1/2 of me missing" and stuff. I know its vain and stuff, but its hard work to be thin and so I like hearing stuff like that! If you know someone who has lost weight (OTHER THAN ME, I MEAN) its pretty safe to assume that they'd like to hear it if you think they look good. Sometimes people don't know whether or not to say anything, but I say its probably pretty safe to do it!

Now, I'm on to yet another new week - its gonna be a tough one - Leanne is leaving this week to move back to finish her last year of school. Boo boo boo. I really will have to work hard not to use food to comfort myself... Yesterday I ate 4 of my big double chocolate homemade cookies in the afternoon cuz our cat is sick and I was stressed out. Boo boo boo. And you know what? The food did make me feel a little better - at the time. But not today - now I just feel fat and out of control! ARGH. But, so far today, I'm eating better so that is all I can do for now - one step at a time.

Kay, thats enough journalling for me - I've gotta go get ready so we can go grocery shopping! Have a good Monday, friends!

WEEKLY Exercise Points Earned:3,4,3,3,0,1,2

WEEKLY Flex Points Used:2,5,10,1,?,?,?

WEEKLY Water Points Earned:0,0,1.1,1,0,0

(13)

How Refreshing!

My friend Tara posted a link on Facebook today that I thought I'd share here because its so nice and refreshing - a picture from Glamour magazine of a "normal" looking woman! HOORAY! Its so rare to see - in fact, I've NEVER seen a picture of a mommy tummy like this published in a way that makes it look beautiful. How nice. Just thought I'd share. If you'd like to view the article that I got the pic from, the link is posted below, or you can just click here.

Here's to having a mommy tummy and being PROUD of it! :o)

http://www.glamour.com/health-fitness/blogs/vitamin-g/2009/08/on-the-cl-the-picture-you-cant.html

August Week 2

WEEKLY Activity Points Earned:3,3,0,3,0,3,3
WEEKLY Flex Points Used:4,10,5,10,?,?,?
WEEKLY Water Points Earned:0,1,1,0,0,0,0
So, I guess this week I earned 11 points...
And once again, I'm happy its a new week! Man, this is tough to do during the summer, with holidays and everything! Argh...

Last Week (Which, Thankfully, is Over!)

WEEKLY Activity Points Earned:1,3,2,1,3,4,1
WEEKLY Flex Points Used:3,6,4,14,2,9,??
WEEKLY Water Points Earned:1,1,1,0,1,1,0
So, this weeks points for the competition totalled 18. I missed on 6 potential points this week, but I guess I didn't do as badly as I thought because I still got 18!! :o)
So, I don't want to know what everyone else in the competition's totals are as of today - because if I'm losing too badly, there might be some small (or even fairly substantial) part of me that decides to give up because its hopeless. So, please don't tell me your totals. The only reason I'm posting mine is because this is where I do my tracking, and that's how I do it. Sorry.

Now on to a new week in which I do much much better!!!! :o)

Welcome to August!

August has arrived, and along with it, a new competition! This time it looks like there are about 6 of us who are doing it - so its gonna be a good one! :o) WW has been a challenge for me over the past few weeks, but slowly I've been getting back on the bandwagon here - but its tough. I've been re-realizing that the name of this blog is very appropriate and I will never have actually arrived at a place where I don't have to think about watching what I eat and drink and how much exercise I do. But that's life and so I'll plug away at it and do my best. This month, that means that I'm going to try to drink 48 oz of water every day, exercise every day, write down what I eat, and try to eat with moderation - staying within my weekly flexpoints. I'd love to reach my 50 lb weight loss by the end of the month but I know that I'm not supposed to set those kinds of goals - so instead I'll work on these behavioural goals for the month and see what happens!
I've been neglecting both of my blogs a lot lately - but have recently found out that I"m going to be having more time coming up (more to follow about that - see my other blog...) and so I hope to not neglect the blogs so much anymore! Here's hoping, anyway....
So, that's that - we just got home from a weekend away, so I'd better go and continue to tidy up around here! Have a great week friends! :o)