Which One to Choose??

As I was eating my lunch the other day, I got to thinking about how the "new version" of Weight Watchers has some really good points. One of them is to try to always choose foods that are going to fill you up for longer instead of smaller foods that are the same points value. A good example of this is the lunch I was eating that day. It was 4 points and left me feeling absolutely stuffed!! 1 point of strawberries, 2 points of omlette - I used only egg whites and some fat free cheese, and 1 point of toast - 2 peices of whole wheat WW bread is only 1 point. It was an awesome meal.

On the other hand, I could have chosen to have 2 of the cookies that were in my cupboard tempting me. They were the noname version of oreos and are 2 points each - for a total of 4 points.

Which of those choices has more calories?? Neither. Which one will make me fatter?? Neither. Which one will make me feel fuller for longer?? Well, that seems obvious.

I'm trying desperately to remember this "rule" as I'm deciding what to eat from day to day, but it can be tough. Sometimes, all I want is some of the nastily delicious mudpie brownie ice cream that is currently in our freezer!!! (4 points of that would only be a QUARTER CUP of icecream - or 4 tablespoons...) (ACK).

So, I try. This is going to be a tough week for me because we're having Elan's bday party this weekend and I'm making a couple of cakes and CAKE with ICING is my most nastiest temptation. I just want to eat and eat and eat. So, I'm gonna try to exercise a lot and not eat any bonus points all week except for that day. We'll see how I do...

The Difference A Year Can Make!

See how my baby and I have changed since a year ago this evening?? I think we're both much happier with our bodies today!! :o) But I sure was happy a year ago this evening too. Happy Birthday Baby Doll!

What Was it I Wanted to Say??

I've been thinking that I've had so many posts mulling around in my head lately that I'd have to do one a day until they're all accomplished. But I can't even remember them. Okay, no wait - there are a couple of ideas coming back to me - but its waaay too late to sit and type them out right now, so I'll just say hope you all have a good week this week.

It's Elan's 1st birthday tomorrow - and I was thinking about how a year ago right now, I weighed something like 70ish pounds more than I do right now! Crazy. I did NOT enjoy being 3rd trimester pregnant AT ALL. I'm so glad I'm not pregnant any more!! :o)

A Little Bragging

Well. Today my dad, grandma, and sister came to visit and we had some birthday cake after lunch. (HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DAD AND ELAN!!) Anyway, the cake was a lot more points than I am allowed at the noon meal ever. Well, I thought to myself "Today is thrown out the window! Oh Well!!" But after they left, I FELT LIKE JOGGING, so I got on the treadmill and did my daily jog.
Then, we went to BK for supper, and I have to tell you - I wasn't hungry, so I DIDN'T ORDER ANYTHING. Yeah. I just had a coffee while my family ate burgers and fries. Yeah.
Then, when we got home later, I was getting hungry so I had a WW version of PB&J for 3 points and that was that. I have to say I think I might have made up for my lunch!!
I'm just astonished at myself.

Wow, that was a boastful post. Sorry. But I had to share.
:o)

My Thoughts Today

Oh, they are many... my brain is all over the place and I'm driving myself crazy. I had plans for a few different post ideas here, but now I think they're all gonna be jumbled into one.
Lets start with confessions and boasting... I have to tell you that this morning was one of the first times in a while that I ate a bunch out of stress and didn't care. The good news? It was really only 6 points worth... The bad news? I wasn't hungry, I've been doing good lately, and after that little binge, I am tempted to just be mad at myself all day for this, and it spoiled my lunch, which I am now craving even though I'm not hungry - simply cuz it is routine to eat lunch right now. grrr.
Okay, the boasting - I have gotten up before the kids yesterday and today and done my jogging. YAY. I have been slowly boosting the length of the jog and the speed of the jog. So today, I was up to a 5 minute brisk walk, followed by 21 minutes of jogging 5.3 mph and then a 7 minute cooldown walk. So, I'm pretty happy with myself for getting "back on" the exercise bandwagon. I put that in quotes cuz really - last week when I "fell off" the exercise bandwagon - all that meant is that I only jogged 3 times in one week -not 7. Which actually makes me laugh because that is still pretty good. But this week, I'd really like to do it daily, and so that is my goal again.

What else?

I've been feeling fat lately. Not feeling the boosted self esteem that I've talked about here before. Now that could be a symptom that a certain feminine experience is about to occur to me, but it makes me mad. How can I possibly look in the mirror at this body I've worked very hard to get to and see only the fat and the rolls??? Come on, Colleen!!! It just makes me mad that I still feel that. I think I'm going to have to accept that even the thinnest woman in the world could look in the mirror and see fat. That is something I'm going to have to work on with myself. I know that most people don't lose weight and then keep it off and I'd really like to not be one of those people. So one of the battles I'm going to have to fight is in my mind. Well really that is the biggest one. Learning to love myself just for what I am and then take care of this body just because its the right thing to do. But my brain is just so silly.

Anyway, I lost 0.4 last week - which was pretty much what I expected cuz I was bang on program for about half the week and the other half, I did pretty good but not perfectly. These last 4 pounds till my next goal are proving to be difficult! I think its just the lighter you get, the slower it goes. But even a 0.2 loss per week is better than nothing - and is better than a gain!!

So, I will keep on going! Sorry for the long rant. But I feel better getting that off my chest. Happy Thursday, Friends.

Made For Keeps Blog Giveaway

Hey, here is a fun giveaway I found through my friend Shayne's blog - click here to check it out! You can enter to win a fun prize. If you are into stampin up or card making - this blog is for you!
Just thought I'd share. :o)

REASON TEN - To Be In Control

I hate the feeling of being out of control. Like when I'm in the kitchen at 10 pm and not actually hungry, but am stuffing my face like a maniac while no one is watching. I am not in control at that point. Or while I'm preparing supper and then cleaning up after supper, the constant picking at the food and snitch, snitch, snitching. It drives me nuts. I drive myself nuts doing that. And I am not in control.

When I am living out of control, I gain weight. Or at least certainly don't lose weight. I think about food constantly and, I am embarrassed to admit, often hide what I'm eating from other people. I act like an addict. Because thats what I am - a food addict. It amazes me how much I can identify with friends I have or have had who are trying to recover from other addictions - drugs, alcohol, smoking, etc. I think that the behaviours of addicts are in many ways universal. You just substitute what the object of the addiction is.

That is one reason that I have named this blog "A Lifelong Journey" - because I know that I will have to be working at this forever. I'm not just here for the weight loss - I'm here because of my addiction to food. This will be something I have to be conscious of all the days of my life.

So, the last reason on my top ten list is that I want to be in control. It feels good to be in control - not to have the food control me, but for me to control it. Things like throwing away the last 2 bites of cheese burger because I'm not hungry anymore, or not snitching brownie batter while I'm baking them because I don't have the points for it, or getting on the treadmill to jog even when I totally don't feel like it - because I know it is good for me and healthy for me and I will feel better when I'm done jogging. Those are things I never would have imagined would make me feel good - or that I could even do. But I have done them more and more lately and am amazed at how great I feel as a result.

Its funny cuz Trevor said to me a few weeks ago "You know what is most attractive about the new you, Colleen? ... Its your self-control."

Huh.

Not how I look!

Nice. Cuz, truthfully, having self-control is probably one of my most important reasons for me to be doing this. So I'm glad that its working.

I WILL KEEP ON GOING!! Only 3.6 pounds till I can go to WW for free! 5.6 pounds till my WW goal weight, about 11 pounds till I pass my lowest weight ever, and 17.8 pounds till my ultimate goal. I CAN DO IT!